00438 The high seas (5ft)

When the waves are way over mast height and there's no room for error, you have to be able to rely on your vessel. That's why I sail the PS001 and 002 series. I've been in this game for over 117 months and if there's one thing I know, it's how to pick a stable seaworthy craft that'll ...

... *&$£!@!!ing things sunk!

oh well, I guess half an hour was all I should've expected from a bunch of twigs

00437 TP5B nostalgia

Seen here during maintenance, the TP5b underwent primary testing, but never lived up to the promise of increased range. At this time no craft had flown beyond a standard heft (right arm over)

00436 conspiracies and ideas

I can almost feel the trickle of ideas running down the gullies in my mind, just like a small stream that you find in the woods which you wished was a bit bigger because you know that it would be more impressive and memorable that way.

In no particular order, the shapes and colours of the water that flow slowly through my consciousness can be interpreted as follows ( if there's anyone out there willing to take these up, just do it):

A hole punch for leaves in the shape of tiny people' silhouettes, so that you can leave a little trail wherever you go.

Thingy for joining cartons together to make huge temporary sculptures, so that you can have something a little more inspirational in your house than a pile of waxy paper waiting to be recycled.

Cable drum which leaves messages on the sand - I've seen this before, but there so much more that could be done with it.

There are a couple of other personal bits that are just on my list of things I have to make, such as picture frames for pooh sticks, rake art, eggs and tiny planes (which I am now referring to as natural curiosities, for some reason). Also picture books, more boxes for sparebots, and some other goinks and dooh-dahs.

With that out of the way, here' a thing:

So I'm on the path to making an amp with a speaker, set in a nice wooden box which also works as an iPhone charger and dock. Now, I've looked around extensively for hints on how to get around the new 3G and 4G iPhone wierdnesses when it comes to charging and it seems that it's a little more complicated than just providing power and ground to the unit. Anyhoo, I found a video tutorial about how to wire the thing to work and I starred (bookmarked) it in google reader - and all trace of it has disappeared! It's not on the awesome Make Blog where I saw it and there's no mention of it's deletion anywhere on the site. I'm really not conspiracy theorist, but it all sounds very much like a conspiracy. OMG! I AM A CONSPIRACY THEORIST!!! Aieeeeeeeee!
Wait a minute, who are you anyway? I have no idea who's reading this. I have to get out of here. I MUST FIND A PLACE TO HIDE!

I'll sit in the shed - it's where I normally go when this happens.

00435 Double Booooooom!

And again, a stunner of a drifter post by Jeff at Booooooom! This time a world-wide affair. Love how the images just scroll and scroll and keep on scrolling

00434 Tinier and tinier

As any responsible airline would, we are aiming to make safety our first, and in fact, only priority. With this in mind, it's with the greatest of pleasure that we welcome you all to the unveiling of the latest addition to out fleet:

The TTP1

At around half an inch in length, she's the smallest member of our line, but don't let that fool you. With the omission of engines of any sort and the use of materials found lying on a beach, we've managed to cut emissions down to a poultry 0 (unless it accidentally gets dropped on a fire, in which case that figure increases very slightly). But far more groundbreaking that that is the projected safety of the TTP1. With her lack of propulsion and fuel, and with no means of movement at all, coupled with being too small to fit into (by a long way), we've managed to completely eliminate any chance of fatality from all conventional forms of danger present in today's air transport. In fact, so benign is the TTP1, that we can now guarantee that your flight (such as it is) will be 99.995% safe. Were it not for the slight possibility of choking on the aircraft, we'd be looking at a completely clean sheet.

Happy flying!

00433 Beachbots

We went to the beach, what with it being summer and all and when we got there, there were already loads of tiny little people on the beach.

I say people, but they weren't really people.

They say they were people.

I still say the were'n't people.

They say no, really they were people.

I say no, I can see that they weren't people.

That's when the fight started.

and I stepped on all of them.

Some of them didn't bother.

Mind you, they weren't real people either:

yes we are

00432 And the drift goes on ...

Booooooom!'s (that just doesn't do it for me grammatically) "Little Drifters" season got me inspired to go out an pooh stick 'till I could pooh stick no more.

Don't know if I tried to hard this time (it's not like if I strain enough, they come out better), but at least it got me doing something a little more different.

They still sink when I sit on them.

00431 Little drifters

Booooooom! are (is) doing just what I'd hoped someone would do. It's invited people to make little boats, launch them, photograph them and sent in the images. Love the way Jeff has woven in the community approach to all this.

Here's the entrance guidelines.

They're also being published in the Vancouver Sun when they're good and ready, so I'll keep 'em peeled for that.

Booooooom! rules!

But also invites others to rule with it

00430 You can laugh now

I'll be the one who's laughing when the apocalypse comes and I gaze out from my space ship and watch you all as you burn:

I just need to get this shrinking ray working and then we're all stations go

00429 Plane to see

I give them away to children in the vain hope that they will last more than a minute



Which they never do

00428 The beautiful losers

Another triumph of ugly practicality and haste over grace, design and poise.

00427 Exit?

Could it be any worse?

I hope so, then there'll be more and better.

00426 The P3-55

beaut, in't she?

'course she was an early model that never went into production

because she was tiny and made of sticks!







you muppet

00425 The purpose of being

... is revealed in the musings of man

I spend an hour or so on some of these and they never turn out as well as when I just throw them together

I just can't predict how they'll turn out and no one else can either

or so I thought

Little do I know that data is collected on their performance and general aesthetics and combined to create meta-stats which are held in secret vaults deep underground.

They float, they sink.

The wind moves them, or they drift to and fro' at the whim of the tide.

All of this is recorded.

Teams of scientists work in shifts for decades on these raw figures to try to fathom the infinite depths of man's effect on his environment in the hope that one day these trivial musings might provide some clue as to why we are here and how the decisions we make form patterns in the ether which point to the existence of a higher power.

hang on ... so how do I know all this?

what was all that stuff about "little do I know"?

oh ... I see ... I made it all up




that is such a let-down

00424 Box

Don't touch the coins!

His head will go on fire!

Told ya

And while he luminesces, his friend gazes into pools of ever-changing colour:

the fool

00423 Anything but plane

... that's what I told the barman in Herm as he stiffed me £2.80 for four packets of salt and vinegars.

Still, at least I didn't get plane, I GOT ROCKET!

With a light balsamic glaze and parmesan shavings

00422 They fly! They fly!

... but only if you throw them

and then they are broken.


There's butterfly wings:

And then there's Shelly:

As you can see, I've included a visual parts list for anyone who wants to waste hours of their lives, mocking God's greatest gift by wielding the mighty weapons of futility and trivia as I have done so effectively for many years. It's a battle of the righteous against the pointless. For my part, my loyalties lie firmly with the latter and I find very easy to fight and win.

It's especially nice if you brought beer.

JOIN ME! JOIN ME NOW!!

but not if you can't be bothered

00421 And in her place ...

Like a scarlet harlot, rising up from the parts of her forebear:

She's on loan - well, at least her body is. Frame courtesy of Andy.

It's almost like adultery, but in metal.

(and without the sex)

00420 She's going away

There might have been tears if I wasn't a harder man.

I love her, but I smothered her in plastic and buried her in a box and sent her away.

WHAT KIND OF A MONSTER AM I?!?!?!?!?!

I told her we'd never be apart

sniff

Actually, I told her I'd send her off for a respray.

00419 See plain

Sea plane:

also on this beach:

winners and losers

At last over-design triumphs over beautiful simplicity. I've been waiting so long for practicality and common sense to take a back seat.